In the Beginning

I’m going to come at you from a biblical perspective for just a minute. Regardless of your belief system, I think what I’m about to point out is pretty relevant.

John and Stasi Eldredge are Christian writers, authors of the books Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul, and Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul. Wild at heart is specifically geared towards men, and though I have not read it, I had heard great things about it. When I stumbled upon the women’s version (Captivating), I was excited to pick it up. I confess it was a slow read. Honestly, I haven’t finished it. It engages you in the beginning, but kind of drops off about a third the way in. I will eventually finish it, but in the meantime did glean something pretty important from the first chapters.

On page 25, whilst recapping the creation story, we are taken to that time when God had completed all his great works. The earth, sun, sky, seas, the garden in it’s perfection. Then God does something that seems so, human. He creates Man, in God’s image. Why is this significant? Because it wasn’t enough.

It wasn’t enough.

So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
Gen. 2:21,22

You, sweet lady reader, are God’s final act of creation. The entire WORLD was incomplete, until God made the woman. The Eldredges describe this as “the crescendo, the final astonishing work of God.” They go further to instruct us to go find a lovely window seat somewhere, looking over the the earth, and think “Creation reached its zenith in me.”

Now, you might be muttering “well I am NOT a believer in your good book, oh blogger extraordinaire.” But even if you aren’t, I think it’s pretty damn important that one of the most significant and recognized pieces of religious literature proclaims this very fact in it’s Genesis. I am a believer in that Book, but as you get to know me a little more through this blog tis full-of-awesomesauce, I hope you get to know that I want great things for all my lady friends regardless of their own beliefs. Because there are a lot of people out there who aren’t complete without you.

Okay, that was a ramble. I admit it. I’m fresh at this blogging thing.

So what does this have to do with mascara? Not a whole lot, but the point of this blog is to find your sexy. Sexy TOTALLY starts on the inside.  If I really wanted to get nitty-gritty we could get all ‘nutritionally’ sexy too.. but frankly, I prefer to play with makeup and pretty stuff. I’ll leave the nutrition stuffins to some other great blogs that I will eventually find my way towards. For now, we’re going to talk mascara.

Jeni was stoked to read my first post, and then made a Facebook proclamation that one of her resolutions was to wear mascara daily. I think that’s an AWESOME starting place.  Let’s talk about why.


I have no clue what time it is for you, but for me right now, it’s 8:44am. I’m sitting at my desk trying not to make contact with a ToDo list that is trying to catch my attention from the dining room table. “HUSH ToDo list.. The more you irritate me, the longer I’m going to blog!”

So far this morning: I crawled out of bed and washed my face. While the kids got ready for school, I emptied and loaded the dishwasher, fed the minions, ushered them out the door, and sat down with my coffee to blog. At this very moment, my hair is still pulled back in the headband that I put on to wash my face with. Needless to say, I am mascara free.

Mascara is usually the last bit of makeup I apply when I wear makeup. I am NOT a great wearer of the face, but I would love to get better at it. I am hopelessly devoted to BeautiControl products, so those are my products of choice, but here’s what I think we should all do EVERY DAY..  this isn’t evening makeup, there are no smokey eyes here. Just basic, fresh faced, out the door makeup. Get up in the morning, wash your face, and put your makeup on. For you that might be moisturizer and mascara, or just a little powder foundation and mascara. Maybe just a little blush, and MASCARA. Mascara is not optional. Mascara sets your eyes off. It is the difference between staring aimlessly at the cereal shelf at the grocery store ($4.oo for Cookie Crisp. Are you effing MAD?), and demanding the attention and eye contact of the cashier when you flaunt that coupon AND plug in your mperks members number (How about $1.25.. EAT THAT!). Stated simply: it makes your eyes pop.

Doooo eeeeet.

I am about to get really vulnerable here. These are pictures of me this morning. Hair still in headband, and still in my nightie. Nothing cool and sexy, just a sleep tee. Regardless, these are the steps I take so at least if the Fed Ex man throws a package at my door, and then glances in my window, my eyes will pop.

Brace yourselves.


Zomg. Nekkid face.

This is me, post face-washing. PRE-mascara.

For me, mascara goes on after my base-face. That means I like to put on at least foundation and a little bronzer before I go all ‘poppin’ eyes’.

So here are my tools:

I keep my makeup in a little zipper pouch from Thirty One. I have the large cosmetic zipper bag where I put ALL my makeup (such as eyeshadows and whatnots), but for the basics that I want to keep with me during the day, I want a little pouch that will fit in my purse. So here’s whats in the bag:

cream to powder, bronzer, eyeliner, mascara, lip gloss

I don’t actually keep those brushes in the pouch, and the primer is a sometimes thing. What is primer? It’s this super silky product you put on before you apply your makeup. As you apply it over your skin, it stays dry to the touch, but your makeup will glide on smoothly and evenly. It’s pretty cool stuff. Aaaaanywho.. Let me show you why mascara is so important..

Me with foundation on

My skin looks smoother, no doubt. But still.. zoinks.

A little bronzer perhaps?

But something is still missing. Hmmmmmm…

Lack of skilz yo.

So I’m posting this picture to show how lumpy I apply my eyeliner.. It’s not great. My hands are shaky. I use a BeautiControl liner pencil, which has really soft ‘lead’, so there’s no drag. Drag is when it kind of grabs and pulls at your skin as you attempt to apply. I just lightly touch it to my skin and tap it on slowly. So it doesn’t have that magazine close up look, but that doesn’t matter. Why? Because once you put your MASCARA on, your sexy ass eyelashes block your less-than-stellar eyeliner work.

BAM! Okay, not my most flattering pic, but my eyes are all the sudden THERE right?

I swear I haven’t had a stroke.

But really, if you can look past the unattended-to hair and jammie shirt, the eyes are kinda sultry, no?

This wasn’t awkard or anything.

So I tried to crop that picture in photobucket about eleventy-billion times.  Oh well. You get the point. My face looks finished and my eyes, in my humble opinion, look kind of pretty.

This was only a CRAP TON of work, because taking pictures of yourself without looking ridiculous is impossible. It took me a ton of snapshots in the process to realize such. So after composing all those attempts at a semi-serious tutorial of sorts, I threw on my favorite shirt and took two Hipstamatic pics of the more original me:


So what is the moral of the story? It is this.. Putting on mascara takes less than five minutes, and makes your eyes pop. You too, can have poppin’ eyes every single day.

Blogging about it, on the other hand, takes two hours. And now, that ToDo list is having an epic meltdown in the other room. CURSE YOU TODO LIST!



Behind the Chair

I am a hairdresser. I have been for 13 years. The beauty of my job (aside the obvious trying to create or assist it) is the flexibility. I work in a salon two full days a week, and some Saturdays. As a mother of four smallish people, flexibility is vital. I find some significant irony in my life at the moment though. Allow me to elaborate.

My bread and butter is the beauty industry. Women. Style. Product. Metro-sexual males. When someone walks into my salon (okay, my sweet friend’s salon, where I rent a chair.. but it’s like a second home to me), they expect to leave completely changed. They might flip through a hairstyle magazine, but more often will find their inspiration after pouring through an Us Weekly. Some celebrity photo, though intended to look unflattering. You know the picture. Even on some of their most average days, when out shopping, or going to a movie (not a premiere, just a movie), riding their bikes, whatever.. they can set the tone for how a woman here in West Michigan thinks she should look. Jennifer Aniston going shorter or (if humanly possible) straighter. Zoey Deschanel’s amazing bangs. Whether my client is 17 or 70, I know what she wants, because I want it too. They want a look that makes them feel beautiful, attractive, sexy, relevant.

The great irony (alluded to in my first paragraph) is this: it takes work. That carefree beautiful look and natural sense of style, well.. it comes naturally to very few of us. So what do we do about it? Wallow in our own average appearance and existence? Resort to a biased bob with minimal styling required for maintenance? Hide in our comfy clothes and Ugg-like replicas?

NO! We resist dangit.

See those sexy toes up top there? Those are my friend Jeni’s toes. Let me tell you a little about Jeni. She’s a graphic designer, a triathete, a fitness guru, an artist, and a total mom. She’s completely awesome and a great friend. In a way, she’s a lot like you. And me. And Jennifer Anniston. Why? Because she’s a woman. Complete with a vagina and a monthly cycle. She gets bitchy and crampy and frustrated. There’s stuff she has tried and failed at, and she hasn’t met all her goals yet. She wants more. To do more, to achieve more. We ALL do. But here’s what I love about Jeni.

In the last 5 months she has participated in a triathlon, jumped out of an airplane, ran a half marathon and learned how to juggle (balls. legit juggling yo).

She’s doing it. I mean, look at those feet. Maybe I have a total fetish, but that picture is hot. Shiny red heels in a public restroom. When is the last time YOU put on some shiny red heels? You might say you’ve not happened upon the occasion to yet. Well let me assure you, putting on sexy shoes MAKES the occasion. True story.

What’s my point? It’s this.. You want to be pretty? You want to feel sexy? Want to break away from the mom image and hair cut? Then do it. Now. Today. I’ll do it with you. We’re going to go out, and find a style we love. Then we’re going to rock it. We’re going to rock it hard. And one day we’re going to realize that when we’re out and about, people look twice at us. But we won’t care, because we already know we look great.

Stay tuned.